Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Japan 1 - Nick 0




Son of a bitch!!

I didn't even get off the airplane and I have an e-mail address from a Japanese woman! Hell yes I took a picture! How can you blame me?
So what if she has 4 kids back in San Diego, spoke VERY poor English, and is coming to Japan for the soul purpose to sign divorce papers... I'm a gaijin who hasn't even touched DOWN on the SOIL of Japan but I'm already getting it done. Hot damn!

And she was so sweet.. it was as if a Churro and Funnel cake made romance in a park...

...By the hand she helped me fill out all my paper work at customs.

Told me to e-mail her so she could help me around Tokyo... God Damn you Japanese girls!

Rivers was right

....





First thing I did when I got to the hotel room?

For those of you that know me well this shouldn't come to any real surprise-I took a giant dump.
BUT HARK! To my delight, what do I find? A mythical device I've only heard about in stories from the Orient... A BIDET!

Good heavens, the Toilets in Japan do things to me Loved ones wouldn't!

I've never felt more cleansed and accomplished.

A COUNTRY THAT WILL PAMPER YOUR ASS THEN LICK IT CLEAN?

Japan wins.
Japan 1 - Nick 0
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7 comments:

  1. AnonymousMarch 24, 2009 at 7:05 PM

    so you going to bang a land that or what? you probably should just for the ezperience...vagina that is.

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownMarch 24, 2009 at 8:58 PM

    I thought the first thing you would do in your hotel room is look for hentai. Straight tentacles son

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  3. UnknownMarch 25, 2009 at 3:42 AM

    First off hentai is a very classy thing. Tentacles ain't shit compared to school girl gangbangs.

    Secondly, I am looking forward to reading this blog on the toilet especially if the post is about the toilet.

    Much love Gman.

    ReplyDelete
  4. UnknownMarch 25, 2009 at 8:32 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  5. UnknownMarch 25, 2009 at 8:46 AM

    Yes Austin One day I hope to enjoy this 'vagina' I've been hearing so much about.
    But for now I'll have to settle for whacking it crazy Japanese television, and believe me it is CRAZY.

    Amizle - My dearest friend. I am completely 'tentacle'ed out! Michael Lu showed me enough Tentacle porn in Costa Mesa to make a giant squid jealous. I'll have to try out this new school girl gangbang I've been hearing about.

    Ramil - The connoisseur of poop.
    The toilets here are amazing son.. well sort of.. the other toilets are insane

    i suggest googling them

    ReplyDelete
  6. UnknownMarch 25, 2009 at 12:19 PM

    Nice work Cuz.

    ReplyDelete
  7. SeaweedJune 23, 2009 at 12:31 AM

    substitute teacher turned writer-of-silly-blogs. well done, mr. G, well done.

    ReplyDelete

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